What is it about us that makes us feel we are always “right” regardless of whether we are?
There’s a line in a movie that’s a favourite of mine “KPAX”, starring Kevin Spacey, “Ah… you humans.” Which he says with a resounding sigh. It’s a brilliant film and a wonderful look at human nature.
I often ponder the state of “human nature,” this weekend I saw much of it and some of it gives me hope for the future and some of it… not so much. It seems the more things change, the more they stay the same.
I did some work with people and their dogs and also in my community garden, which for the most part I find enjoyable. Dealing with people who have very strong opinions about how things “should” be done, can be a minefield and I have made great gains in my education on how to engage an individual that has no interest in what I have to say. One needs to be able to think on their feet and acknowledge another’s feeling and point of view if there is going to be any semblance of “polite conversation.” Being able to listen to another, without interrupting them while they are speaking is an art form in and of itself, especially when you hear something that you disagree with and feel the need to get your point across.
The “art of conversation” seems to have turned into a “state of war” with no “rules of engagement.” The “us against them” ideology seems to plague us now more than ever and I am hard pressed to understand why this is so? Are we so wrapped up in our own needs, wants and desires that we cannot view anything from someone else’s perspective? I am a firm believer in the “ many faceted story”. I love listening to others stories and sharing my own. We ALL have stories and we all have the “right” to be heard. We also have the “right” to walk away from a conversation if it is not to our liking but in my estimation that is the fuel of discontent and not a good way to resolve a conflict of opinion.
I was verbally assaulted this weekend by someone because of a statement I made that was not within keeping of this individuals moral high ground. Luckily, I do not take offence easily and they beat a hasty exit after giving me a lesson in “how I SHOULD behave so that I did not do a disservice to my gender.” This again speaks to the us “against them mentally” which I see so regularly in daily life.
Standing up for ones beliefs is to be commended but trying to bully someone into sharing your beliefs is never ok. It’s something we humans have to work on… continually. Your opinion matters to me regardless of whether I share it. If you feel the need to be derisive or use arrogance as a”tool” in your interactions with “others” you may want to take a long hard look in the mirror and ask yourself “how would I feel if someone spoke to me the way I just spoke to you?”
I have often been accused of “opening my mouth to change feet.” That having been said I try never to use words as weapons and I will stand fast in the face of opposition. I love a good debate and I will often play “the devils advocate” just to encourage a lively debate. What I don’t do is wear my heart on my sleeve which my father taught me. “If you wear your heart on your sleeve, it will surely be broken.” Also “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me” was another of his favourites. We are living in a time when what we say means just as much as what we do, as much of our world has become “virtual.”
It is my hope, not just for humanity but for all the inhabitants we share this planet with, that we can create a world where there is room for all without suffering and oppression. A world of tolerance and understanding, not opinion and opposition.
Enjoy your journey 💖